A pox on all their houses

I have one major problem with the group I would usually refer to as my college 'friends'.

The thing is, they mention Stuff That Can Happen - and then it happens to me.

I lived in blissful ignorance that underwires can work their way out of bras for years before one of these college friends complained about it within my hearing. Voila, within a couple of weeks it happened to me.

Again, I had no idea that desktop computers had a battery that assisted them to store settings and things like the date. A friend complained and BANG my computer woke up next morning thinking we'd taken a little trip back to 1950-something and my screensaver was gone.

I've left college now. I should be safe from the jinx. But no, I still keep up with things going on in the lives of some of those I lived with at college. This is obviously a mistake.

My friend Givinya over at Killing a Fly complained about washing. She has two kids more than me, so her laundry pile is going to be huge. She's entitled to complain. But not when you consider the effect of the college friend jinx.

My washing used to be one load a week at college; expanded to between 1-2 when I lived by myself and had to add household linen. When we married it would probably have become more than that, but we lived out of town (i.e. rainwater tank supply, not reticulated) and I had to use the super-economical twin tub where you can wash everything you ever owned successively in one tub full of water. It's hard to get a comparison.

We recently got our greasy mits on a second hand automatic washing machine. So I've been celebrating the fact that I don't have to spend hours on a Saturday standing over the twin tub pulling stuff out of the washing tub and putting it into the spinner, rinsing it by hand, and spinning again before the next load of washing is ready for the spinner. Then rushing out to hang the last load while the next one is spinning. I did have it down to a fine art, but it is wonderful to leave the machine and come back 30 mins later to hang it out.

When I got back from Grandad's I knew I would have some washing to do for my Beloved, despite the fact I'd washed most of my stuff and some of his. I did not sign up for this amount of washing, and for some reason it feels like more when you can assign a specific number of loads to it.

How much do I hate my college friends right now?

...Approximately None (despite everything)

Where's Wally?

Two words to answer where I've been.

The Flu.

I'm now getting closer to caring about the rest of the world - particularly as the trip to the doctor ruled out measles and other nasties and possibly has found a cure (or at least a starting point) for the dreaded 'itchy spots' I've been putting up with on and off since '99. We'll see.

The number of types of food I'd like to be allergic to if it isn't an environmental allergy?

...Approximately None

(But hey, it's got to be better than a fungal/tinea/roundworm answer - surely)

Freaky Friday

In my spare time I've been reading Philip Yancy's book "The Jesus I Never Knew". I have the great privilege of reading over my breakfast because we have no kids, and my Beloved goes to work early and lets me sleep in that extra hour after the alarm (I don't think he wants to talk to me until I've woken up properly on the off chance that I turn cranky and violent).

The thing I like about this book is that Philip Yancy tries to find examples to illustrate to us how the words of Jesus must have sounded to his first listeners, rather than interpreted through 2000 years of the Christian Church.

I ran into this quote about how the Jewish Sanhedrin would have viewed Jesus' claim that he could destroy the temple and rebuild it within three days, "Imagine the reaction today if an Arab ran through the streets of New York City shouting, 'The World Trade Centre will blow up, and I can rebuild it in three days'."

I thought that it was a pretty good illustration, but it doesn't have the unexpectedness that Jesus' words would have had. Just like the destruction of the Jewish Temple, we all know what happened to the World Trade Centre. Of course, before the 11th September 2001, it wouldn't have meant as much outside an American (or Financial guru-type-person) audience, as many of us in the rest of the world didn't know anything about the building before it was gone.

As a matter of interest I turned to the publishing details at the front of the book... 1995.

The chance that I'm not a little freaked out?

...Approximately None

Washing Day Bra - R.I.P.

I mentioned this poor garment a few weeks ago. While I was away I actually got around to washing it - and who puts their Oldest Foundational Garment Available into a laundry bag? It's not like the poor old thing is going to be stretched or damaged by being washed!


Ask not how the bra can be damaged, but how the bra can cause damage.


Like one of Givinya's commenters, one of the smiley wires came out. Similarly, it made a break to get caught in the innards of the machine, trying to work its way through a hole in the washing drum. Unlike that same commenter the end only started to work it's way through, and became wedged. No damage to machine (thankfully, because it was Nan's almost brand new frontloading one). Wire almost unscathed.

Likelihood of me remembering to keep the evidence for photographic blogging purposes?

... Approximately None.

Jet Lag?

Hi Honey, I'm home!

So I'm back from my little bloggy holiday and I'm suffering from a close ally of jet lag. I mean, it can't be jet lag, because I haven't been anywhere near a plane, but I'm seriously suffering from the change in time zone.

OK, so my regular readers would recall that my time was spent at Grandad's house and I can walk it in 25 mins, but that doesn't mean there's no time zone change.

We had a great time. I had time to sit and listen to his war stories, and the early part of his work as a Methodist Minister; we giggled at huge numbers of episodes of "Dad's Army" (set during the same war); and I found a stash of Nan's kid's books, delightful, sweet stories set in the '30s and '40s and many published in accordance with 'War Production Economy Standards'.

I'm having some difficulty re-adjusting to this time zone.

Chances that I can just stay in '40s rural England?

...Approximately None.

And I was at the Nutters' table...

I went to a Public meeting last night. It was related to my work.

The newly amalgamated Regional Council are preparing a Planning Scheme. This will rule my life for the next half-dozen years. It is in my best interests to be there to have some input in these early stages.

Being a reasonably friendly person, when Dad (who gave me a lift down) took the last seat at one table, I went off and sat with some people I didn't know, introduced myself and spent some minutes in idle chatter before the thing started.

Mistake.

Before the meeting started I realised I was amongst agitators (and what's worse agitators with the opposite agenda to me - which of course makes them wrong).

Within the first group working session I realised I was with the Nutters.

By the second group working session I was amusing myself by listening to their input. The highlight being when an elderly gentleman sat down and explained in words of one syllable (with the aid of diagrams) how a system of zoning works - have I ever mentioned I'm a qualified, certified Town Planner?

By the third I'd had enough of the whinging, un-focussed discussion that wasn't really getting anywhere or going to achieve anything. I wanted out.

Then I looked around and saw a sprinkling of the town's other Nutters at other tables. I wasn't the only person at a table with Nutters. Then I realised, I'm the sort of Nutter that goes to public meetings.

How much does this do for my self-image?

...Approximately Nothing.

My Clayton's Holiday

So, I'm on holidays, have been since lunchtime on Thursday...

Well, I'm actually staying with my Grandad while Nan's away. They live a very long way away, like about 1.2 kilometres. I can walk it in 25 minutes.

My theory was I was going to sit around and read books for two weeks. OK, so I have to water Nan's plants every now and then, and make sure that Grandad's getting fed regularly, and I'm thinking it might be nice to do a bit of a clean-up before Nan gets back, so that she doesn't have to do it straight away. But on the whole, I'm going to read books, take the LBD for some walks, sleep, you know.

Oh, and I have a few other things that I'm trying to do in all that spare time:

• Prepare to lead an ecumenical church service (yesterday - now done!)
• Prepare and circulate agenda and reports for the Congregational Meeting (yesterday - thanks to the wonderful lady who took minutes in my absence)
• Prepare to preach at our church service next week
• Do my Bible Study homework for tonight
• Go to Church meetings on both Tuesdays of the fortnight
• Be on-call at the hospital for Pastoral Care this week
• Finish 2 work reports
• Make 1/2 dozen work phone calls

The chance that this is not going to be 'the holiday you have when you're not having a holiday'?

...Approximately None