Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Explosively Funny?

Disclaimer: No Jennifers were seriously injured in the making of this post.

I learnt a new lesson on Monday.

When cleaning out a thermos-style milk jug with a hinged lid do not under any circumstances do the following:-

1. Sniff it and discover that it smells a bit icky.

(Well, okay the sniffing wasn't pleasant, but actually had no potential for injury)

2. Decide it needs a really good cleaning and partially fill it with boiling water and detergent.

(You can see where we're going, can't you?)

3. Find that the only available kitchen brush does not fit into the opening, so that there is no way to actually clean the interior.

4. Decide that I'll have to shake it vigorously instead, so put my hand firmly over the lid.

5. Discover that somehow (and I didn't do physics in Senior, so I'm only guessing that this event is triggered by some obscure steam-expanding pressure-building thingamy) vigorous shaking causes a build-up of pressure such that it will explode the lid open and spray boiling water over the mug stupid enough to try it.

It was so unexpected by everyone that another lady, after helping me to find wet towels and frozen peas, asked me how it had happened? When I explained, she made the mistake of saying, "What, like this?" and did it again. Fortunately I had sprayed about two thirds of the water all over me, so she didn't actually get burnt at all, although she ricked her shoulder jumping back from the 'unexpected' spray. Truly a Plass* moment.

I'm fine. Frozen peas, the gift of an Aloe Vera plant (to cut up leaves to apply to my skin) and a call to my little bro (who is a paramedic) seem to have saved my skin. No marks on my face at all, and only a few red marks on my chest which are thankfully away from either sensitive or visible areas. No blistering to date. It remains to be seen if I peel - using lots of moisturising cream and Aloe Vera.

Of all the people in the world how many other people could have this happen to them?

... Approximately None!

Although I am encouraged to think that there is at least one person who is sillier than me.

*In Adrian Plass' book "The Sacred Diary of Adrian Plass Aged 37 3/4" he manages to cut his thumb on a knife while doing the washing up. When asked how he had done it he did the same thing with his other hand, causing the same injury. Plass tell it much better than me.


Givinya De Elba said...

Oh poor Jennifer! I hope all heals up quickly.

Long dark hair, blue eyes said...

I have done the same thing with gravy. Don't feel too bad!

Wendy said...

I once fell into a pool, trying to demonstrate to the mum, who was looking after me (yes, I was primary aged), the incorrect way to stand on the edge of a pool (that is, with your back facing the water and only your toes on the edge). I probably should have had stitches on my chin, but my sister got more attention for the bee sting she got that day! Funny how those days stick in your memory. I did learn from the first experience, though!

Kitty and Glen said...

Oh dear! At least you weren't hurt. And, as you say, at least the other lady helped you feel a bit better about it all! It's one thing to do that in the first place (you were only experimenting - after all, people called Christopher Columbus crazy), but it's another thing altogether to copy someone else AFTER it's clear it's probably not the best thing to do...

Stranded in Stepford said...

Hmm. . .how about the girl who was so excited to eat the chicken and dumpling soup that she'd just made (completely forgetting that the process of making dumplings involves BOILING HOT CHICKEN SOUP) that she took a big slurp from the mug and not only burned her stupid tongue but managed to spit out the lava onto her (ample) cleavage and suffer a second degree burn on the girls.
Chances that stupid girl wasn't me?

You know the answer!

P.S. the girls have since blistered, oozed and peeled but I'm goign to have some 'splaining to do come bikini season if the red welts don't fade. . .

Hippomanic Jen said...

Thank-you to all my bloggy friends who have helped me to feel SO much less stupid. Maybe my usual ending wasn't so appropriate for this post!

Crazy Sister said...

Oh yeah, done that too.

•´.¸¸.•¨¯`♥.Trish.♥´¯¨•.¸¸.´• said...

been there done it too ...more than once ( more recently ...usually trying to get the last bit of sauce out of the jars ...Chicken tonight, Dolmio etc )

Hope you are okay.

I enjoyed the Adrian Plass book too.

Next time grab a packet of Milton tablets - they work in cold water ;) and it will sterilise/disinfect, clean the gunk and smell, plus it is great for removing tea & coffee stains

Femina said...

"And then Elsie - then he put the OTHER hand in..."

I've done it with a Dolmio jar too. Surprises me every time - my ability to retain this information seems to be worringly low.